Slumrat Rising

Chapter 131: Seeing Anyone?

Truth was feeling a bit sorry for himself by the time he finally jogged into Nag Hamadi. By the time they had reached the city center, a comfortable run had turned into a three-dimensional, high-stakes obstacle course as he bounced over carriages, across chariots, off buildings, and between pedestrians. All while Merkovah’s dagger hunted him. It was fun and, doubtless, a learning experience, but it was exhausting.

“How did you keep spotting me? I thought I was pretty thoroughly hidden most of the time?” He complained. Nag Hamadi kept the temple comfortably cool. Truth sprawled flat on the ground, trying to shed his accumulated heat and recover some cosmic energy. He still wasn’t sure how much of it was in his head, but the cool stones felt good.

“The answer is distressingly simple- the higher one’s cultivation, the more in tune they are with the stars and, by extension, those grand excellencies who emanate them. In other words, the higher one’s cultivation, the more in tune with “reality” one is. Given how thoroughly concealed you are, anyone under Level Four can directly forget finding you, and almost all Level Fours can too. Weaker Level Fives would have to be actively looking for you to find you. I would say your odds of detection from anyone below the middle of Level Five, or specialized tools or spells of that level, are negligible.”

“So you can just see me.”

“I kind of have to squint, but yes. Also, there is another point you aren’t considering. Incisive is letting you overwrite your immediate local reality, asserting a slightly different reality. Between the blessing of the Silent Forest and Incisive, you are projecting an identity of “not something to pay real attention to.” Well, how much harder is it to ignore someone running through traffic and jumping around like a frog?”

“I wasn’t… helping them fill in the blanks, as it were?”

“More or less. Incisive and the Blessing both need to work harder the more you deviate from the expected reality, and both are operating off the cosmic energy within you, so…” Merkovah shrugged.

“Same thing is true with detection spells, by the way. The more you pass for a permitted person, the more they will ignore you. It sounds bizarre, but with low-level guards and basic spells, you can break into an army base wearing a green cap and a blank piece of paper the size of a pass. Secured facilities, not so much. But just onto the base? Very doable.”

“Fun.” Truth grinned.

“Yep. Although, and I assume there is NO REASON I would need to mention this, but you know that Nag Hamadi can see right through you, right?”

“Right. Yes.”

“Uhuh. Alright, that’s it for the day. Wash up, rest up, and get ready for a crash course in life as a revolutionary.”

Truth jerked at that.

“Revolutionary?”

“Oh yes. A revolutionary. And all methods must be considered.”

____________________________________________

Truth decided that Etenesh was doing a real number on his head. And he liked it. She simultaneously made it clear that he was in control every step of the way, while guiding him every step of the way. Having a very attractive girl lead you into pressing her up against a wall, making out with you, then whispering in your ear exactly how you are going to press her down in bed that night and take charge of her… Well. It did things to him.

He had his own ideas, naturally, which tended to get enthusiastic approval. Which also really worked for him. And Etenesh knew it. It was incredible. She put him firmly in control by making sure there were no surprises of an unpleasant sort. Everything that was going to happen was planned and approved in advance. They were teased. They were seductive. They fascinated him. Far from making things restrictive or predictable, they made them safe, which gave him room to be daring. She encouraged his daring.

Several days had passed since Truth returned from the Silent Forest, and while he might still be a virgin, he sure wasn’t feeling like one.

“Want to try something?” He asked.

“Sure. What did you have in mind?”

“Well, you liked the blindfold. Would you like to play around with me being imperceptible?”

She frowned a little at that. “This and that aren’t quite the same. Mmm. I’ll try it, but if I say stop, I do mean stop, ok?”

“Always. Close your eyes and count to three.”

She did, and he put Incisive into action. She opened her eyes, the ocher in them dimming. He reached out and stroked the lovely curve of her face. Etenesh’s eyes opened wide with shock, and she almost screamed, “STOP!”

Truth snapped back into view. “I am so sorry!”

“God! That was horrible. Hold me!” Truth grabbed her and held her while she shivered.

“We aren’t doing that again.” He said.

“Too right we aren’t!” She took a deep breath and settled down. A few minutes passed that way. Truth wished she would say something but didn’t want to ask. He felt like he had already fucked up enough for one night.

“Oh, stop that.”

Truth jerked.

“You spend so much time focusing on projecting your reality around you that when you aren’t focused on hiding, I can read you pretty easily.”

“I didn’t realize.”

“Well, I can almost always tell when you are slipping into a depressive spiral. And you need to stop that. I’m the one freaking out here, not you.”

“Um. Ok?”

“Haaah. Look. I liked the blindfold because it made me that little bit helpless and really focused my attention on my ears and sense of touch. I could feel safe because I knew you were there while feeling a little scared and excited because I couldn’t see what you were doing. It was a lot of fun. But this? This was gross.”

Truth felt like scum.

“I SAID KNOCK IT OFF!”

“I can’t help feeling bad about making you feel bad, Etenesh!”

“Yes, but you are making me feel bad about making you feel bad about making me feel bad! Just settle down, and let’s talk it out.”

He took a deep breath and tried his best to push aside his feelings. Just… be present. Listen. He didn’t know how long he could hold it for, so he nodded encouragingly at Etenesh.

“Look, the way you explained it is that Incisive projects an identity you want, and the Blessing helps erase your presence even more, right?”

“Something like that.”

She sighed. “A reminder that it’s both partners’ responsibility to think things through. Dad was right again.”

“Huh?”

“You managed to eradicate the presence of the person named “Truth Medici,” or any other name I might know you by and replaced them with “Someone else. Someone you can’t see and don’t know.” And then I felt you touching my face, an invisible stranger touching my face and twisting my perception. I felt…”

He heard the word “violated,” even though she eventually chose “extremely uncomfortable.” And he didn’t know what to say. He struggled to stay in that empty place of just listening.

She sighed. “I think part of the reason I’ve been so weird about you-”

“You have been weird about me?”

“Compared to what I’m usually like? Yes. But I really enjoy doing this with you. Don’t get that wrong. But I’m being weird because, for the first time in my life, I get to be really possessive with someone I want to be possessive with.”

Truth almost choked on that. He could feel Etenesh grinning at his sudden burst of humor.

“You are in Siphois, pretty man. Possessiveness before marriage, and even, arguably, after marriage, is a sin. To be clear, and you had best be clear on this, monogamy is not possessiveness. You and I are an exclusive deal, or there is no deal.”

“I don’t think you have much to worry about on that front.” Truth said dryly.

“I don’t? Mister tall, handsome, mysterious, dangerous, brooding man. Riding around on his iron horse, sword by his side? Practically screaming his loneliness but with a fierce look that would chase away the weak-willed or insufficiently thirsty? I have nothing to be worried about there, do I?”

“No. You don’t.”

She convulsed a little, grabbing him harder. He felt her shake a bit. His chest got a bit wet. “Etenesh?”

“You have first girlfriend-itis. Or whatever you call it. You have no experience with healthy relationships, so I seem amazing. And it’s not fair to you, at all. Because I am doing my absolute best to be amazing for you. To completely dye you in my colors. To make whoever you meet next seem bland and boring and ugly. So that you have no choice but to come back to me.”

Truth had no idea what to say. He wanted to deny that he was going anywhere, but…

“Oh, I know. Merkovah needs a bodyguard like the sun needs a torch. You are another one of his students for the job everyone knows he does for the Crown, but nobody can come out and say it. If the job even has a name. You aren’t sticking around, Truth. You are going to leave me. And you don’t know if you are coming back.”

“Yeah.”

“Is it worth it? Worth leaving me? Leaving Siphios? I assume you are going back to that Hell you escaped.”

“It is. I am.” Truth tried to sort out his words. “My siblings are still trapped there. And if I don’t do the job he needs me to do… Etenesh, I’m not sure there is going to be a future where you and I could be together anywhere. I’m not sure there is going to be a future for this planet at all. At least, not one that involves humans.”

Etenesh was openly crying now. “You are going back to Hell to save your brothers and sisters and the whole damn world.”

“I only have one sister. Her name is Sophia. She is the smart one in the family. I hope you will like her. Harmony is the steady one, always ready to help out. He tries to sound tough, but he’s the most thoughtful of us all. Vigor is the youngest and the best looking, damn him, before my self-improvement. Him you can stay away from.”

Etenesh snorted through the tears.

“I have been looking out for them since… I don’t know when. Since around when Harmony was born, or a little after. I knew nobody else would, and somehow, I just knew that’s what an older brother should do. So I did it. I don’t think I ever put it in words, but I looked at that fucked up situation, shrugged, and said, “Okay,” then went and tried to do something about it.”

“I swear you are going to give me a condition. I’m never going to be able to hear the words “Okay” the same way, ever again.”

“I’m okay with that.”

She calmed down a little, then pulled him over on top of her. Which was a… dangerous choice, given her insistence on not having sex just yet. Especially when she had him pin her hands above her head the way they both liked.

“I want you to know.” She looked up at him, ocher eyes blazing in the dark, with the sound of rustling feathers around them. “I want you to know. I am enjoying this so much. I am getting off on this so much. Being your first everything. Guiding you through everything. Convincing you that what I am showing you is everything, even though it isn't. I am dragging it out as long as I can because I want you, you, Truth Medici, completely focused on me. The way I focus on you. I want you as possessive of me as I am of you.”

She started rocking her hips slowly. Side to side. Up and down.

“I really am planning something special for your first time. It’s going to be a religious experience. I am doing everything I can think of to make it the most memorable sex possible. And I’m going to lie to you, Truth.” She whispered, drawing his face closer to hers.

“I’m going to look right into your beautiful eyes and lie. I’m going to promise that if you stay with me, it’s going to be like that every time. That the world is big enough and ugly enough to look after itself, and the two of us can just vanish into the mountains and live together forever. Loving each other forever.”

She arched her back, pressing herself against him, eyes fever bright. “I’m going to do my very best to ruin you with love. Because I am greedy. I am selfish. I am walking without God’s guidance anymore, and some part of me hopes you aren’t strong enough to tell me no.”

Truth groaned and bit down on her. Pressing her down into the mattress. Needing her.

“Because if you do tell me no, Truth, then I am truly lost. Because that means you are the man I think you are. You will have dyed me in your colors, and I will never escape you. So you must come back to me.”

She gasped as his teeth tightened on her neck. “You must come back to me. My hero.”