A Rational Zombie

Chapter 1

I dont remember much. Who I am. What I did. How I got here. All of these things have been forgotten. But even after forgetting all that, there are some things my body remembers: Hunger. Thirst. Fire is hot. Okay, my body didnt remember the last one, but after walking through a patch of burning metal hunks, I learned again about how hot fire is. It didnt hurtnothing does, but bits of my skin melted off and exposed the flesh underneath. It should heal after a few days. I dont know why I think thats the case, but Im certain after a few days, my skin will grow back. There must be some kind of mechanism in my body that performs it. It wouldnt make sense otherwise. If my body never healed, then how did I survive for as long as I did before losing my memories? At least, I think I survived for a long time. I cant remember. There was a boy staring at me. A child. Through a crack in the door. I was eating. Yes, its certain I wasnt born yesterday. But I might as well have been.

Did I mention my body remembers hunger? It eats at me from the inside. Spreading its vicious claws out of my stomach, tearing at the soft, tender innards. Overriding all my thoughts with the pain that gnaws and gnaws, driving me insane. What was I thinking about? Hunger; yes, I was thinking about hunger. But theres nothing to eat around me. Everything is lifeless. The hunks of metal are too hard for my teeth to bite through. The rubbery bits underneath them are softer but still impossible to chew. Theres soft meat on the ground, but its rancid. Rotting. Disgusting. Even the hunger rejects it, making me feel even worse after consuming it. Before I lost my memories, what did I eat? I mustve eaten. Maybe the hunger ate my memories.

A store. Yes. A convenience store. There is always food in a convenience store. Thank God I remember how to read. God? Who is that? I cant remember. He or she mustve been someone important to me before I forgot everything. Other people are heading to the sign that says convenience store too. Its certain. Food is there. These people look just as starved as me: Their ribs are showing. Drool is pooling out of their mouth. Disgusting. Will that be me when my hunger consumes me? When these tendrils extending from my stomach reach my brain? I dont want to be a drooling mess. I have my pride. I cant lose to hunger. I cant lose to myself. I am me. The hunger should obey me, not the other way around.

Whats that smell? Something is wounded. Weakened. I can kill it, and then I can eat it. I can eat. Other people have noticed it too. Theyre moving faster. Their drool is hitting the ground like rain on a street. Some of them are moaning. If I dont hurry, there wont be any left for me. Its screaming. The prey is screaming. Ive heard many screams since I woke up. If I knew screams meant food, I wouldnt be so hungry right now. I shouldve followed the screams earlier, when I could think clearer. When the hunger wasnt clouding my mind. My mouth hurts. My teeth itch. I want to bite something. I need to bite something. The prey. The preys screams are turning shriller. If this goes on any further, the screams will stop. And there will be no more food for me. That cant happen.

This man. What is he doing? Why isnt he going to the store? Hes stuck on a metal hunk. Hes in my way. His hunger has turned him stupid, dumb. Hes no better than an animal. But the screams. Theyre coming from inside. Inside, behind the glass, my food awaits. The drooling man keeps moaning and clawing at the glass. His fingernails have fallen off, and his hands are painting red streaks. I cant turn into that. I cant let my hunger consume me. The prey is inside an enclosed space. There has to be a way inside. There must be. It makes no sense otherwise. But this drooling man is in the way. I cant see. I cant let him continue. What if he finds a way inside? Hell eat the prey first. Then its simple. I have to make him unable to eat.

I grabbed him, but he ignored me. Why is he stronger than me? Is it his hunger? No. Im hungry too. It must be the difference in size. Hes bigger than me. Bulkier. I cant move a metal hunk because its too heavy. He must be the same. Hes too heavy for me to move. Other people are here. We can move him together. No. If we work together, then we have to share. I have to find the way inside by myself. Theyve all lost themselves to hunger; I cant become like them. Only I can eat the food. The other side of the metal hunk. Ill move there. Theres more metal hunks in the way, but if I climb on this man, I dont have to go the long way around.

The prey screams even louder when I walk on top of the metal hunk. Is this the way in? Through the top? I cant see anything. Its smooth. Like a rock. No, theres a seam. But I cant dig into it. I lost my fingernails to the fire. These rounded tips cant get a proper grip. Ill keep this in mind. Maybe the entrance is through the top, but there must be other ways. Ill check the other side. My stomach. It hurts. I know; I have to eat soon. I can see my prey through the glass. Its watching me. Is this the entrance? I tugged on a handle. It jiggled, but nothing happened. The prey stopped screaming. Is it holding its breath? Did someone already make it inside? No. The bulky man is still in the way. The prey is moving. Why is it moving? Is it because of this? I tugged the other handle, and the metal gave way. It opened. The prey screamed and the metal jerked back. No! I cant let it. Not after coming this close.

I placed my foot against the metal hunk and pulled the loose side. The metal hunk opened further. The preys screams rang even louder now that they werent confined inside. The others may have noticed. I have to be quick. I pulled even harder. A second. Three seconds. Ten seconds. Finally, the metal panel opened. The prey screamed and tumbled back. It pressed itself against the opposite side, and I took that chance to come in. I tugged the metal shut, so no one else could interfere. It was just me and my prey. The ones lost to hunger cant steal my food from me. I figured out the puzzle. The prize is mine.

H-hello?

The preys staring at me. I dont understand. Its bigger than me. Rounder. It should be stronger than me. Then why is it the one trembling? Why is it the one thats afraid? Water is leaking from its eyes and nose. It clasped its hands together and shut its eyes.

Please, God. I want to live.

God again. I should ask who he or she is. But if I open my mouth right now, only moans will come out. The hunger is in my throat. In my teeth. Almost at my brain. What did the prey say? It wanted to live. Yes. Live. If I dont eat, then the hunger will kill me. Itll consume my brain. I want to live too. Then I must eat.

There was a shrill scream. Thenlike the earlier screamsthere was silence.