Chapter 157 - Blood, Lust And Tears- Part 1
The night was eerily quiet.
Vivian didn't know if it was because the weather that was coming to freeze the lands of Bonelake or it was because of the emptiness that had come to fill them after they had visited the deceased. Like the way they had made a trip to Paul and his families grave, Leonard had taken her to where his parents were buried. Being a man of few words Leo stood there holding Vivian's hand in his, letting the silence encapsulate them while letting the silent words transfer to the dead.
Jan had almost got all her clothes and other necessities to Leo's room after they had left the mansion, giving the servants enough time to shift and arrange in their absence. Though the maids who were asked to help were in question wondering to themselves if this was going to turn to one of the scandalous of the town where the Duke was seeing a former maid turned to a lady, the couldn't find out more on what had caused the sudden change as the housekeeper was a stern man who would have only glared at them. The rumours soon flew around the mansion and amongst the servants whispering to themselves with their own speculation and theories.
Vivian sat in front of the mirror, brushing her hair and taming it down before she plated them from the back loosely. She hadn't given it much thought in the morning as she had been in a hurry to get dressed to go to the Rune's mansion but now that she sat there with enough time to spend, her eyes popped looking at the discolouration spots on her skin. It had turned dark. Leonard had bitten her over and over to the point where there were marks all over her neck and shoulder when she pulled her dress sleeve to look at it.
She looked at the door waiting for Leo to come. A councilman had arrived to speak about work which was holding him back while she waited for him in the room. On their way back home and during the time of dinner, he had been quiet. His words short to her words which she didn't mind as she was used to it.
While placing the brush back on the dressing table, she caught sight of something in the drawer. Curious she opened to see a red ribbon that had been tucked and folded carefully in one side. She furrowed her eyebrows wondering what a ribbon was doing her and what did Leo keep it for her. So far she remembered, she hadn't seen him tie any lace like a ribbon around his collar when he was young. Perhaps it was something when he was younger?
She wondered if it would give out some of his own memories and with that thought, she picked the smooth satin ribbon, running her fingers when a smile came to form on her lips after a few minutes. Who knew it was of that time, thought Vivian to herself. With a smile on her face, she looked back at the door again.
Unsure if she was to stay awake or get into bed, she walked back and forth in the room before coming to a halt. Deciding to take a peek on what was taking long, she stepped out of the room and went down to the stairs where the doors were closed and locked which meant the guest who had arrived her had gone back to where he was needed to go. She wondered how long it had been since the man had gone as he had arrived at their doorstep when they were having their meal. After the meal, she had gone to take a bath to wait for Leo in the room. Padding her feet on the carpet that had been put on the floor, she walked towards the lower rooms to see Leo not there.
Wondering if he was in the study room, she turned the knob and stepped inside to see him standing at the window with a glass of alcohol that rested on the raised platform. Upon feeling her presence, his face lightly turned in her direction to not reveal his face.
"Leo?" she called him and when he turned around her heart broke into pieces.
He looked broken and crushed, his eyes red as his droopy eyes stared at her. Her hand clutched at her sides to see him in this state. It was the first time she had ever come to witness him like this. He took the glass that was resting to down the remaining liquid down his throat before placing it back with a small clatter.
It must have been some time since the councilman must have left for the intoxication to work on Leonard, thought Vivian to herself. When she took a step closer to him she stopped right away seeing him raise his hand and her heart clenched at the distance that he was trying to keep her from him.
"Why aren't you angry at me, Vivi?" he questioned her with remorseful eyes.
"Because it wasn't your fault," she answered to hear a dark chuckle erupt through his lips. He tilted his head.
"How can you say that I not only killed the man who practically raised you but also his family. You were angry that I killed Vlass, that man who whom had met for the first time. So why won't you get angry?" there was a slight slur which wasn't visible enough for Vivian to detect how much alcohol he would have consumed, "I killed the family who had faith in me. I also let my family die right in front of me, killing my mother. One day...one day I might kill you too," his words broke her heart further.
There was melancholy and despair as he said, unsure as if the decision he had taken now weighed at his shoulders.
"It will never. I have faith in you," she said taking a step forward but for the first time he took a step back to keep the distance between them, turning around he picked the bottle that had been on the other end. Pulling out the cork, he took a swig from it, "None of us knew," she spoke to him softly.
"No. We didn't but I had no faith and now I feel I didn't do enough. Not enough to save any of them," Leonard took a couple more gulps before placing the bottle to walk towards the fireplace. Vivian followed his trail, she heard him continue, "You believed in Paul when I didn't."
It was true. She believed him but if it wasn't the switcher then wouldn't it have been her naiveness that had led her to believe in the previous housekeeper's innocence? Her judgement was purely clouded with the relationship she had built between her and Paul and his family.
Standing where she was, she saw the light fall on Leo's face that looked sad. There was loneliness in there, pain that he had stubbed at the back of his mind finally surfacing which he hadn't spoken about to anyone. Vivian was close to Leonard but it was Julliard who read Leo and heard what his cousin had to say to him. With Julliard gone, Leo had shut everything around with no outlet to release and let go of the pain.
"We didn't know, Leo. My judgement was given emotionally while you tried to be rational. I was angry at you, angry for not sparing other's lives but..." Vivian paused trying to find the right words so that it wouldn't hurt him more, "You know the world better than I do. And I know you tried your best to prove his innocence. Whoever masked himself as Paul was good enough to fool all of us. He had even fooled us with Sister Isabelle. You did what you felt was right," subtly moving close to him, she didn't break her gaze away from him and gently placed her hand on his arm, "Sometimes we try to do what we find is best..." pausing a few seconds, she took a deep breath before speaking, "You had to do that to your mother because her heart was corrupted, and I was there," though it wasn't something she liked to say as it only emphasized that he had killed his mother quicker because of the danger that presented at Vivian.
"How can I be angry at you for something you didn't know of? Which we both knew nothing of," a tear fell down from Leo's eyes and turned his face away from her to look at the fire, "Leo," she called his name gently, to see him break internally taking in the guilt like a nail that was tearing his insides hurt her more to see him in this state.
"Aren't you worried, Vivian? For the future as to what may happen?" he asked her seriously.
To this, Vivian shook her head, "No. It doesn't scare me and it shouldn't scare you either. I know and believe you will do what is right," Leo turned back his gaze at her, "You're my husband now," she said it with a cheerful smile on her face hoping it would make him feel better.
"Yes," he responded, taking her in his arms, hugging her with one of his hand cradling her head, he held his dear one close to him.
Vivian hugged him back, her arms tightening around him to only comfort him but also to let him know that she would love him no matter what. Knowing he wasn't the kind of man to take a hasty decision without a proper reason.
Tonight for the first time it felt as if she had seen a side of Leo which she doubted he would have let anyone see. His worry, he had entrusted it to her which meant a lot to her. It showed how much they had progressed in their relationship where he was letting her in.
Since they had found out about the switcher impersonating Paul, Leo's mood had dropped. A melancholy settling around him which she hadn't been able to drive away. It was evident that now they had found out the truth, he blamed himself for killing the innocent lives, for taking them away forcibly. Like Vivian, he had known Paul for a long time. Paul was a good man, and so was the rest of his family. She knew if Paul was alive he would have smiled at her, telling it was alright and at this thought, she hugged Leo tighter.
Maybe she would never know the amount of pain, guilt and sadness he would have to carry on his shoulder but Vivian wanted to be his pillar-like he was hers.
And maybe this was one of the rare time where Leonard had opened up to her about his internal turmoil and would not happen again as he was someone who dealt with the pain himself.
This brought her to the memory of what she just felt before coming to down to find him. The ribbon was the same one which he had used to tie around her neck when both he and his cousin had decided to gift her as a present. But the memory was more than what had happened in there. The ribbon had moved around. First to Vivian, then to Charlotte which went back to Leo's hand. Like many other times, Leo got into trouble but this one was when she had touched him for the very first when he had bruised his face.
"What? Never seen bruises before?" he had asked her, his voice daunting for her age but she instead of feeling frightened she had asked him,
"It hurts?"
He gave her a confused look, "A little bit," and she had placed her warm sleeve on his face which had led to him swatting her hand away embarrassed. Though she didn't remember it, she was glad for once to be able to see things that she would have never remembered.