Canon Fodder

CHAPTER 110 THE MISSION

“Kirigakure is the village hidden in the mist,” Shinju said as we sat in the dinghy. It had a small sail that propelled us as we rode along the coast toward the Land of Mist. The village was far out, but there were plenty of small islands to stick close to along the way. Reina, Hina, and I sat on one side of the boat. Evelyn, her butler Kenta, and my new maid Shinju sat on the other side. Evelyn leaned her head on Kenta’s shoulder as the man directed the rudder. I nursed my balls. Evey and I got in another fight when we got to the water after she tried to push me in. 

“The Land of Fire, where you all are from, pretty much ends at the coast. There are some fishing boats that are allowed to go out a short distance. But the water is owned by the Land of Water,” Shinju continued. Evey had told her to explain things on our journey. 

“You’re from the Land of Water?” I asked, despite the oxymoron, that was how it was named in Naruto so I went with it. They were surrounded by water, and were known for their water attacks. 

Shinju nodded. “Yes, from the lower caste.” 

“What’s that mean?” I asked. 

Shinju sighed. “There are 3 castes in the Land of Water. The highest ranking are ancestors of families that stem from the original inhabitants of Kirigakure. Back before the First Shinobi World War. The middle ranking are families of allies during the war. And the lowest are the families of those who fought Kirigakure, and their land was annexed by the village.” 

“Jeez, are you treated pretty badly?” I asked. 

“We used to be, but the recent Mizukage has helped reform some of the…classism,” Shinju noted. Her face was emotionless as she explained. Her red eyes were striking, but I was having trouble picturing taking her as my maid. I preferred Reina and Hina that were an open book. 

“So how did you get involved with my sister?” I asked. I looked to Evey but she pretended to sleep on Kenta. 

“How I understand it,” Shinju said. “The Watanabes have been acting as spies for a long time. There are many…fatherless children born during missions to the villages. Your clan keeps eyes on them. Evelyn found me when she started undercover here some time ago. Taught me how to use the element that no one knew I had.” 

I nodded. “Makes sense. We have more illegitimate cousins all over the world? A lot in the village of mist?” 

“A few,” Shinju said. “They are all older. Which is why I was chosen as your maid.” 

I frowned. “Something tells me this has been in the works for a while then,” I said. 

“It has-” Shinju said. 

“I get to explain the fun stuff,” Evey cut in with a big yawn. She smacked her lips looking to me. “We want you to seduce the Mizukage.” I stopped my surprise from showing. I had expected some noble, not the Mizukage herself. 

“What,” I said slowly. “Makes you think I can?” 

“Background first,” Evey said. “The Mizukage has been in charge for a few years now. He is a tall man and strong. But he has an interest in young boys so…” 

I almost didn’t catch it. “Him?” I asked, scared beyond belief as my heart began to pound. “I heard the Mizukage was a woman.” Evey and I locked eyes. She didn’t answer. “God damn you bitch,” I said. “You scared the shit out of me.” 

She cackled loudly. Her voice echoing over the water. “You should have seen your face. Yeah, it’s a woman. The first female Mizukage in fact.” I slowly calmed down. No one had mentioned having to do gay stuff. I’d have to get stronger so if they tried to tell me to, I could just kick their asses. Otherwise I would disappear in the night. I was fully straight. 

“The Mizukage is the 5th in a long line of men. Just like our own 5th Hokage, Tsunade. The Mizukage is named Mei Terumi. She is strong too. Very strong. I heard she beat the shit out of the 4th Mizukage for the strongest in the village title. She has swept through with plenty of reforms. Trying to move past the nickname of Land of the Bloody Mist.”

“Right…” I said thinking back. “They made their ninja school kids kill someone to pass, right? A friend from their ninja class.” I remembered the story from the manga itself. “Back before Zubuza killed everyone in his class.” 

“Exactly,” Evey said. “Surprised you know that.”

“Well yeah, I heard it from a friend of mine after they witnessed Zabuza being killed.” 

“Zabuza Momochi is dead?” Shinju asked in a raised voice. The most emotion I had seen from her. 

“Yeah, in the Land of Waves. He was a hired thug. But ended up turning on the guys that hired him. They killed him,” I said. 

“Why haven’t I heard about this?” Evey asked angrily. 

“Well, we are ninjas. Shouldn’t be leaking information you don’t need to know,” I said. 

“You don’t understand,” Evey said. “In the land of Mist there are 7 legendary blades that are passed down in the village. 6 of them are gone due to ninjas defecting. I could sell this information. Do you know if he had his sword?” 

I almost answered, but thought better of it. “I can’t remember,” I said. She glared at me. “Someone has kicked me in the balls too much lately. It’s affecting my memory.” 

“Fine, what do you want?” Evey asked.

“No more ball shots,” I said like it was obvious. 

“No!” Evey said quickly. “It’s part of your training. How are you going to learn to protect them if you leave them wide open?” 

I grumbled. “Fine, 6 months, no hitting them,” I said. 

“1 month,” she shot back. 

“4”

“2”

“3”

“2, best offer,” Evey said.

“Fuck,” I spat. 2 months reprieve sounded too good of a deal. I could get stronger in that time. “Fine.” We shook hands and my balls descended, no longer hiding. “Yeah, Zabuza had his sword.” 

“Was it taken?” 

“From what I understand, my friend buried it next to his grave. They buried him next to the new Naruto bridge,” I said. The only reason I knew it was called the Naruto bridge was because of the manga. “The local thugs might have taken it though.”

“Interesting,” Evey said, a smile on her lips. She was quiet for a time as she thought about what she could do with the information. “Where were we?” 

“The Mizukage,” I said. 

“Yeah. She’s pretty cool, but she is getting older. Not a whole lot of men approach the strongest woman in the village,” Evey said. “A few months back she asked the brothel for an assistant.” 

“You work at the brothel?” I asked. 

“Of course, run by our hidden family of course,” Evey said proudly. “We run most all of them honestly. And have our people infiltrated high up in the ones we don’t own yet.” I nodded, surprised at the extent of our network. “Anyway, there is only one reason to ask for an assistant from us. She wants a side piece.” 

“And…?” 

“And she hasn’t touched any of them,” Evey admitted. “She keeps them around as eye candy. Spends time with them. Only one of the assistants we sent had the 1st stage of the Lust Element awakened, but she sent him back too. We are stuck with men that can seduce her.”

“What about Kenta?” I asked. 

Evey glared. “No one touches my Kenta but me,” she said possessively. “No, we need someone that can go past the 1st stage. Unfortunately that leaves us with you.” 

“What about a guy from one of the other brothels?” I asked. 

“No too many without the Chikyugi make it past the 2nd stage,” Evey said. “Those that have are already deeply involved with other villages.” 

“Okay,” I said. “How do we start?” 

“First we work on awakening the stages,” Evey said. “Shinju is set aside for the next year to assist with that. We keep sending the Mizukage assistants. But since her standards have been so high I doubt she will accept anyone until you are ready. After that we will give you to her. We go from there after that.” 

I nodded, growing excited. I was finally at my training arc. I couldn’t wait to see what I could learn. A thought stuck me. 

“Why were you sent here originally?” I asked Evey. 

“Me? Our information said the Mizukage was probably a lesbian. I was originally supposed to seduce her,” Evey said without shame. 

I barked a laugh. “Guess I have to pick up your slack.” 

Evey glared. Looking to Kenta she ordered, “Hit him in the balls.” 

Kenta looked to me and stood without question. I backed up. “The agreement!” 

“I only said I wouldn’t hit them,” Evey said, a big smile on her lips as her boy toy stepped toward me.