Chapter 128 Aren’t You Full From the Amount of Words You’ve Eaten? 3
128 Aren’t You Full From the Amount of Words You’ve Eaten? 3
"I was an only child. Just like you, I was born because my father needed an heir. My parents were together because of an arranged marriage and not because they loved each other." He slowly reached out to hold the end of a branch of the weeping cherry tree that reached his level.
Tang Moyu noticed that he had this guarded look on his face, something she rarely sees on him.
"My father imposed an iron discipline on me ever since I was born, but I was still a happy child despite it. However, my parents' arguments turned bad each time. My father subjected me to several lessons I'm not interested in and my mother had a hard time convincing him to stop. He severely punished me whenever I failed to meet his expectations."
Tang Moyu's jaws hardened at that. Her mother also did the same whenever she made a mistake and forbade her to shed tears. This caused her to become emotionally detached from the people around her. She just didn't expect that somehow, Qin Jiran had suffered the same experience, but from his father.
"When I was seven, I think they had enough of each other and decided to divorce. I understand why my mother would like her freedom back, but I didn't expect that my father was already betraying her for years with another woman." He continued.
"Once their divorce was settled, I was taken by my father and was forced to live with his new wife and newborn son." Feng Tianyi spat out venomously, which shocked Tang Moyu. She'd never heard him speak like this before.
The Qin Jiran she knew was respectful and had a goofy sense of humor, but she understood that just like the rest, Qin Jiran had a dark side in him.
"You once asked me why I didn't have a wife, right? It's because I never see myself as a husband or a decent father. I'm afraid that I would end up being like him…"
After being treated harshly by his father, Feng Tianyi lost faith and didn't believe in the idea of 'family'.
These were the thoughts which Feng Tianyi had never shared with anyone, not even with his own mother. He didn't want her to think that it was her fault nor blame herself for him turning out like this.
Feng Tianyi hated his father and hated how he cast him and his mother aside when he thought he didn't need them anymore. If it wasn't for the Song family, the Feng Conglomerate would have been long gone. Thankfully, his father wasn't able to take the Qing Tian Group from his mother.
That, Tang Moyu could somehow relate. When she was told that she was to become Feng Tianhua's wife in the future, she didn't have the will to refuse her parents even if she wanted to. She didn't want them to call her an unfilial child, so she could only nod her head in agreement.
She foolishly thought that if she became Feng Tianhua's bride, she would be able to earn their love and acknowledgment, something she'd been yearning for years. But that never happened. In fact, weren't they the first ones to cast her aside when the trouble started knocking on their door?
"As to why I was reduced to this," he laughed at himself dryly. "Think of it as some sort of punishment for myself. You see, Moyu, I'm not a good man. Please don't delude yourself that I'm good, because I wasn't, But that doesn't mean I wish to hurt you or your children…."
For him, they were some sort of a rare treasure he accidentally stumbled on, and he needed to protect them from everything.
"After meeting your twins, for the first time, I felt peace in my life. I was happy to know that they are able to do whatever they please. You've never forced them to do something they don't like, Moyu, and I can see that they really love you." Feng Tianyi genuinely smiled at her. "You are raising happy children, not just some kid that needed to succeed you in the future."
"I understand what you mean, Qin Jiran. Since you also know how I was treated by my family, it's only normal for me to protect Xiao Bao and Little Star." She paused as she gave it a good thought.
"As I said, I don't have the liberty to take revenge on those who wronged me. I have learned so much from what happened years ago. You can be happy anywhere you are, you don't need anyone's approval, you are enough, you are strong. Other people can be part of your journey, but they can't and never will be the destination."
She looked down at him and chuckled. The wind playing with her long black tresses.
"Never put your happiness in another person's hands. It doesn't work like that. It's more like a state of mind, but you get to make it, not anyone else, you. Only you know yourself well. Others will see you as what they mind pictured you, but it's not you. Not exactly. The point is to be happy. Your goal is to be happy and this is the sole reason why I cannot take the revenge path." She shook her head. "It isn't for me."