Husband of the Goblin Tribe

[v2] Chapter Fifteen – In which Ark gives a lonely Ivory a brief lesson in practical economics while soaking in the bath together.

After cleaning a little funk I found in the bath, I took a quick shower after starting the warming Rune so that it would be ready for me to take a relaxing dip in when I came out. However, when I came out from the shower, I found that Ivory had entered the breeding-room and had been looking around for me.

“What’s up, Ivory?” I asked.

“Husband, Truffle is asleep and I’m… feeling a little lonely. Want to spend some time with me?”

“I’d love to. Want to do it here, or in your cave-hole?”

“Here is fine. I enjoy the bath.”

“Alright then, how about we get in and get comfortable together?”

Since I was already naked after stepping out of the adjacent shower, it was simply a matter of helping Ivory to shed her loincloth and have her enter together with me into the freshly cleaned bath. She took a seat next to me on the stone bench under the water line and rested her head on my shoulder. I put a clean arm around her, pulling her body closely against mine.

“Is everything going good for you, Ivory?”

“I’ve been getting busy lately. I might need you to make me a bigger space to store all the bones I’ve been getting from everyone.”

“That’s good though, isn’t it? You can never have too many bones.”

“Oh, I’m happy about that. Truffle is, too. Not having to leave her cave-hole and having goblins bring her all kinds of mushrooms? I just worry that she’ll never leave her cave-hole and get any exercise anymore. I am a little confused about how exactly the standing we’re supposed to trade with is supposed to work. Usually goblins just make a deal, and that’s it.”

“It’s not too complicated to understand. Game and Fun keep track of who brings in what, while Vera updates a special set of records she keeps. Goblins who bring in the things we need from the request board will earn standing based on that. Then you get to decide how much standing the things you make for goblins are worth. When that’s done, the standing earned from goblins who don’t make things the tribe needs will transfer to you when they want something you make. Then you earn standing that way and can spend it on things you want as well.”

“So… I can use standing to ask Berry to make me blue water?”

“Yup. Last I checked, Berry was planning on selling one medium jar for five standing.”

I held up my hand revealing my five fingers.

“Hmm… so if I trade bone charms for five standing each, I can get a medium jar for each one I make?”

“That’s right.”

“Can Berry even make that much blue water?”

“She can if she has a request on the board to bring her blue berries.”

“But… how does Berry give standing away for bringing her blue berries if she doesn’t have any standing to start with?”

“That’s called initial currency… or initial standing. We have a budget… um… a fixed amount of standing we can give out at the start for the first goblins to complete the board requests. After that, we’ll adjust things in order to better make sure that the amount of standing needed to trade for things is mostly fair to everyone. There are also certain goblins who aren’t exactly suited to hunt but do provide a necessary service to Goblinhome, so they will be given standing to keep doing so.”

“What do you mean?”

“Take Lily for example. She hides the tracks she finds that lead to Goblinhome and fetches fresh leaves for us to use in the shit-pit. So, she would get five standing each day she does it. This way, she can do what needs to be done, but still be able to trade you for a bone charm for Primrose.”

“Then… How would Ebony earn standing?”

“She’s pretty amazing, Ivory. She can use her bone-magic along with her magic wand to hunt, she has Bitey to help scout for things, and also Beastie to help carry what she hunts back. Beastie’s strong enough to drag a Redboar by herself, though slowly.”

“And… Button?”

“Well, she’s a natural at finding Mushrooms. I think she might even have a secret spot she collects them from.”

“What about Figurine?”

“Ah, remember when I said bringing in resources would lead to new entertainment?”

“I remember.”

“When not doing hunting or gathering requests, she can earn standing by chopping trees with Doll, or playing music for everyone in the breeding room—for now. I was thinking about making a special cave-hole that makes listening to music sound better just for her.”

“Making a cave-hole? Can you use standing for that?”

“Hmm. All goblins old enough to have their own cave-hole to live in by themselves get their first one without needing to pay any standing. Being a Bloodmaw gives them that right without question. However, detailed remodeling may cost standing, depending on the type. If it’s something that might be dangerous if not taken care of and needs immediate repair, or an expansion to an existing cave-hole for a new strong-one coming into the world, then I’ll take care of it. But if it’s for decoration, like the cave-hole Diana, Orchid, and Lilac share, or Jewel or Stella’s personal cave-holes, then that will probably cost some standing.”

“Does that mean asking you to make me a new room to keep all the extra bones I’ve been getting in is going to cost me standing?”

“Normally, yes. But you see… I happen to have a little standing myself—not much, but maybe enough to trade with you the cost to make it.”

“What are you going to trade me for it?”

“Well, I know this really amazing goblin who makes things with bones, and while she’s usually busy with that or taking care of this lazy mushroom-head goblin who gives her troublesome stuff to deal with all the time, it’s tricky to get a moment with her all to myself. Also, I like it when she sits in my lap and lets me drink from her milkies…”

Ivory bumped me with her shoulder.

“I would do that for free. Ivory likes it when Husband comes for his milkies.”

Ivory lifted her leg over my lap and held onto my shoulders as she took a seat on her propositioning Husband.

“Ivory likes Husband’s eyes now.”

“Do you? I’m still not used to them.”

One of the gifts the Monster left behind as part of the price in becoming it, was a golden ring around the outer ring of my iris. Thanks to it, I can now see in the dark without needing to light up the room with a torch, my magic lantern, or the topaz slotted in the bone bracelet I wear.

“Are you happy knowing that there’s a new strong-one growing inside of me?”

“There is?”

“There is! The night you were a goblin… When I woke up after, I knew.”

I lowered my hands so that I could place them on her sides and move them over her belly.

“Then, I guess I’m also going to have to work hard to earn some extra standing so I can trade with this really talented goblin I know to make her a bone charm when the time comes.”

“You keep talking strange! Ivory is the only goblin who makes bone charms!”

I giggled.

“Who knows, maybe this time you’ll be able to teach our next strong-one how to make them. Then she could help you so that you won’t be so busy all the time, and we can find the time to make another strong-one.”

“Mm… Ivory likes that idea.”

“Husband does too.”

Even though I had just cleaned the bath, I think it’s fine if I let it get a little dirty by showing some much-needed affection to my lonely Ivory. Aside from her occasional quick temper and her hands on approach where it comes to disciplining her strong-ones, she’s really a great goblin to spend time with. She might like to drink more than she should, but I can handle having a wife who likes to be tipsy after work more often than not.

(…compared to Truffle who is a notorious mushroom addict always trying to force her color-spin-think powder on me every chance she gets…)

A little boob therapy coupled with a warm bath made me a happy camper. Also, draining my balls into someone that isn’t nearly six-and-a-half-feet tall who can also crush me easily if they wanted to do so, was quite welcome for a change.

And speaking of boob therapy and six-and-a-half-feet tall women… Grotte had come into the breeding room right at that very moment.

“War Chief! Grotte come take bath. Keep clean what War Chief like!”

“What did she say?” Ivory asked me, since she did not speak Orcish.

“Oh, same thing I told all of you early on. I like it when you all are clean when you come to me for big-seed.”

Ivory nodded, knowing full well my preference in that department. She tried greeting Grotte, and I translated it along for her. Grotte had gotten naked and joined the bath. Ivory was staring at her intensely.

“Something catch your eye?”

“She… her milkies.”

“Ah, Grotte told me that’s an orc custom.”

Ivory slid off of my lap and waded through the water to where Grotte was sitting opposite us.

“What want Grotte?” Grotte asked Ivory who didn’t speak orc at all.

Ivory just pointed to her breasts.

“Grotte, I think she’s interested in your uh… mams decorations?”

Grotte nodded. She reached out for Ivory’s much smaller arm and pulled her hand so that it pressed against her orange-tan breasts.

“Husband… tell her that I think her milkies are pretty!”

“Uh, okay.”

What proceeded from there had to have been a half-hour back and forth with Grotte explaining what all the markings were, about the rings in her… pimpims—nipples, and all sorts of other stuff related to it. It… was actually quite fascinating. I should have a drink with Krushka and ask her a bit more about hers now that I’m learning what it all meant to a female orc.

It’s kind of similar to what a certain demi-god character from a pacific islander animated feature made by a mouse-mascot run mega-corporation in my previous life had.

Heeeey, what can I say except—

Ahem.

Can’t help it… It’s catchy.

“Grotte like Ivory. Have whelp yet?”

“Ah… she has. Have you seen the young goblin with the black skin that has a bone-spider sitting on her head most of the time and hangs out with a skeleton?”

“One who feed Bandit and Missy meat when Orga Lush not look so can pet?”

“Yep. That’s Ebony. Ivory’s… whelp.”

“That one strong. Grotte see use magic kill male orcs with other goblin use big stick make big light before taken to be war-bride. Grotte not want fight. Better find thing to hammer.”

Grotte sniffed the air all of a sudden and went quiet for a moment.

“War Chief mating with Ivory before Grotte come take bath?”

“I was, but it’s not a problem. We finished right before you came in. I was just enjoying my time alone with her. Ivory is rather busy since she makes things out of bones, which are in demand around here.”

“Make things from bones? Can Grotte ask for thing made from bones?”

“I don’t see why not. What would you like?”

“Needle. Want bone needle. Three best, but if only one, still happy.”

I asked Ivory if she had anything like a bone needle, and the discussion quickly became about thickness, length, and all that jazz. Ivory said she had a number of bones which could be made to the specifications Grotte liked, so I was doing my part in facilitating that trade.

The reason for wanting bone needles was as simple as it got. It was for everything. The only thing that these orcs brought with them were a single weapon and the clothes they were wearing. Naturally as former war-brides, and now current ones to me, they were skilled at making what they needed, clothes from animal skin, blankets, the whole nine yards. It was my job as their local human War Chief Husband to provide them with what resources they needed to take care of our uh… orc household.

“Husband… why does Grotte have a seed-stick?” Ivory suddenly asked me out of nowhere.

“It’s not a seed-stick.”

“Looks like a seed-stick.”

“It’s not. You know the place I lick when I use my mouth on you?”

“Yes, you also like it when I use my tongue on Truffle’s place.”

“Exactly. Since Grotte is an orc… you can see she’s big and tall, right? It’s just that… that place which is little on you and Truffle, is a bit bigger on her, that’s all.”

“It still looks like a seed-stick.”

“Ivory… please stop saying that.”

“Husband… wants to spend more time with Ivory?”

“Of course I do.”

“Maybe together with… Grotte?”

“Uh… whoa. Is that okay? Truffle isn’t going to get mad or anything if you’re suggesting what I think you are… is she?”

“Ivory can’t have fun with Husband?”

Damn, to think Ivory was suggesting something like a threesome with Grotte. Shit, I don’t even know if Grotte is cool with something like that.

“Uh… G-Grotte. Ivory just suggested something, but I don’t know… exactly how fine orcs are with… what she suggested.”

“Then tell Grotte. Not lie to War Chief.”

“She… was suggesting that… if you’re up for it… that maybe we could mate… and she could join… in.”

“All mating fun. Ivory same as war-bride to War Chief?”

“If you don’t count the need for a place of authority, then pretty much, yeah.”

“That fine Grotte. We mate here in bath?”

“Uh… let me ask? Ivory… here in the bath or…?”

Ivory pointed at the entertainment area in the Southeastern corner of the breeding room. I didn’t need to tell Grotte who followed where Ivory was pointing.

“Can do there. Mate now?”

We were mating now it seems. All three of us got out of the bath and meandered over to the entertainment area and well… Grotte was already ready for some oral action. I can’t say I was prepared to lick some small (still big) orc clit with one of my goblin wives, or at least that wife not being Pear, but here we were. Ivory and I tongue kissing while the both of us somehow included some kinda-pinkish orc meat in the process. Grotte had no fear of Ivory’s teeth like I did, or maybe she just didn’t get a good look. But then, Ivory’s tongue stretches far out of her mouth so it’s not exactly an issue…

Long story short, Grotte was having the time of her life as soon as I backed off and left that to Ivory while I pulled out the heavy artillery and readied the turret. The breeding room became an echo chamber full of bu~hi~hi~ for a long while. Ivory managed to slip down between rounds two and three so she could have a little more bu~hi~hi herself.

Grotte was also well behaved this time, not trying to crush either of us with her powerful thighs. As strong as an orc’s libido is, she tapped out first. The three of us laid down together and we all wound up taking a nap.

We only woke up when Truffle came to the breeding room looking for Ivory.

Oh, she was mad.

But not for the reason she should be.

She was mad that she missed out on the fun to be had.

However… after that nice little nap we all had, Grotte wasn’t going to say no to another couple of rounds. Didn’t matter to her one bit that there was an extra goblin suddenly in the mix. It was just like she said.

Grotte likes mating!

So does Ivory!

Truffle does too!

And so do I…

Then again, don’t we all?