Chapter 46 – Despair
Chapter 46 – Despair
— Leon Greyrat —
With the Red Dragon Mountain Range looming over the distant horizon, I couldn’t help but smile at how far we had come.
Beyond those mountains… more specifically, past the Red Dragon’s Lower Jaw near the coastline… was the Asura Kingdom.
My home.
Our home.
After three years, we were finally there.
“Leon! Is that-!?”
“Yes, Eri. We’re in the final stretch now,” I said, interrupting her. “...It’s been a long time, huh?”
Eris looked forward before leaning her head on my shoulder.
“It… wasn’t that bad,” she said, looping her arm around mine. “...Right?”
“...Right,” I said before I planted a kiss on the top of her head.
As one might expect from that sweet interaction, our journey has been relatively smooth so far.
Not too much different from the Millis Continent, which surprised me.
While monsters were able to attack the highway, and we needed to fend for ourselves on the road, there were frequent rest stops and towns littered along the way, so our nights were, for the most part, uninterrupted.
As Eris pressed herself closer to me, I couldn't help but feel a certain set of… assets pressing against my arm.
Assets that I couldn’t help but notice growing by the day.
Well, that made sense. After all, she was a growing young girl and was in the closing in on the peak of her growth period as she was now 15.
Thinking about it… we were both 15 now.
We were both… adults.
I felt my cheeks heat up as I shifted in my seat, making sure the tightening in my pants didn’t make itself known, especially to the girl sitting next to me.
Getting flustered just at the implication of sex… I bet Paul would be laughing at me right now if he were here.
But, no. We won’t cross that line just yet… maybe.
Shaking my head to get rid of the arousing thoughts, I leaned on Eris' head as I guided the horses down the road, toward the gateway of the Asura Kingdom.
Yeah, as for us being 15, we could wait to celebrate once we reached Sharia, and that celebration just maybe have some other… gifts.
But for now, I needed to focus!
Focus on the road ahead, Leon!
Following my own advice, I turned my gaze forward and looked at the empty road in front of us, only to realize a moment later, that it wasn’t completely empty.
The heck?
Those looked like… people?
I had yet to see a person not riding a horse or carriage, save for Eris who walked alongside us, and some guards who walked alongside their caravan, but these two didn’t look anything like that.
Narrowing my eyes, I focused on the two mysterious figures.
“Brother?” Norn asked, looking up from her whittling project.
“It’s nothing, Norn,” I said as I stared. “It’s just-”
As I enhanced my eyes with touki, it was then that I felt it.
Fear.
As the now-revealed man and woman came into focus, I felt my body tense in alarm, making Eris sit up straight as well.
The woman was fairly unassuming, with a blank white mask covering her face and long, black hair flowing down her back.
Despite appearing slightly ominous, she wasn’t what I was concerned about.
Rather, it was the man at her side.
With a long white coat and shoulder-length grey hair, the more I stared at the man, the more the feeling of fear increased, causing my hands that were gripping the reins to tremble slightly.
W-What? What the hell was this?
This was… similar to how I felt around Ruijerd at first, but… much worse.
Gulping down my anxiety, I then activated my Demon eye, causing my fear to skyrocket once more.
W-What… that mana… it was overwhelming.
Both in scale and form.
It coalesced inside the man’s body, not letting a single wisp escape like normal people did.
It could only be described as an inhuman level of efficiency.
And then, there was that mana surrounding the man, different from the mana inside him.
No… that was a curse.
Who… no, what was this thing?
Releasing the breath I had unconsciously held in, I stopped the carriage’s movements as I leaped forward, unconcerned at Eris’ state of paralyzed fear.
“W-Who are you?” I asked, raising my blade.
My fear… I was able to combat it, but as I got closer to them, it had increased.
What… was he?
The man narrowed his golden eyes as they surveyed me and my family.
“Eris Boreas Greyrat… Aisha and Norn Greyrat… and Leon of Rakaz…” the man said, looking at me with intrigue. “You’re supposed to either be dead or leading your group in the east. And that odd mana circulation… Is this his work? What is he playing at…”
Huh?
The fuck!?
“H-How do you know our names!?” I shouted.
I then felt Eris land beside me as she also drew her sword.
“Eri, go back,” I whispered. “He… you can’t beat him.”
“N-No… I fight beside you,” she said, though I could hear her voice trembling with every word.
Summoning a barrier to block off Eris and our carriage, I then began walking forward.
“Answer me!” I yelled.
Who was he? How did he know our names? Why did he call me ‘Leon of Rakaz’? And…
Why… despite the fear… did I want to kill him so badly?
The man looked at me oddly as he massaged his chin. “You… should not be here. Is it his doing? This early? Then… I suppose there’s only one way to find out.”
I widened my eyes as I watched his concentrated mana flare across his body.
Was he attacking?
No. I didn’t have the time to think.
I just had to do!
Letting my touki flow through my body and into my sword, I pushed myself to the limit as I leaped forward, crossing the distance in an instant as the colour drained from the world.
And, with the man simply raising his hand, my Longsword of Light was repelled, sending me tumbling across the road.
What?
Quickly getting to my feet and resetting my posture, I leaped back to get between him and our carriage as I tried to get my breathing under control.
He… deflected it like it was nothing.
That… was the Water God Style.
He dealt with me with the same ease as Master did, but… somehow, I could tell.
That… was an even stronger application of the Water God Style.
After all, I could still feel the tremor of the reversed touki in my bones.
Better than the god-damned Water God herself!
Overwhelming mana… overwhelming technique… overwhelming aura…
This man was not an opponent I could handle.
But… that didn’t matter.
I had my family behind me. My sweet little sisters and my beloved Eris.
I would not let this monster get past me.
“L-Leon?” Eris said.
“Big Brother?” Aisha joined in.
Both their voices were trembling with fear, and I’m guessing the earlier display didn’t help quell their worry.
I needed to reassure them.
“I’m fine, you two. Just… don’t interfere,” I said, using my resolve to calm myself.
The man, meanwhile, had been looking at his hand with interest before looking back at me, those disgusting golden eyes piercing my very soul.
“That strength… and that lack of fear… It really is his doing, isn’t it?” he sighed before looking back at me, this time his narrowed eyes radiating a mix of hatred and… pity?
“So you’re an apostle this time too, Leon of Rakaz? A shame.”
I could only see a flash of mana before a fist was lodged in my side, barely blocked by the flat side of my sword that I had raised on instinct as I felt my body get catapulted into a nearby boulder.
F… Fuck.
That… fucking hurt.
Looking up, I was barely able to see past the blood covering my eyes to watch the man step toward me.
“Tell Hitogami that the Dragon God Orsted sends his regards.”
Seeing his mana flare, and feeling an instinctual pull to move, I summoned a blast of air to blow me to the left, an explosion resounding next to my ear as I dodged the attack.
Gaining my footing, I looked back to see Orsted’s hand extended to where my hand had just been, and the boulder in front of it decimated to rubble alongside a few trees behind it.
…I didn’t need a shred of pride to admit that I was outclassed.
There was no world where I could win.
That man, he called himself Orsted? The Dragon God? The second-ranked power in the world? That Dragon God?
Yeah, there was no chance. Especially now that he was aiming to kill.
…But… would I just let it end here?
No… while I couldn’t detect him sending any hostility toward the other three, that could change in an instant, just like it did with me.
So… I couldn’t leave them to fend for themselves.
It’s not likely I could escape anyway, so running was out of the picture.
And besides, if there was no world where I could beat him…
Then I just needed to make one.
Because to me… those three…
“...Mean everything!”
With a shout to remove the last shreds of my lingering fear, I leaped forward at the man, extending my sword that was coated in blue fire for a slash as I summoned multiple blades of wind to attack the man alongside me.
The man stood still, enduring the wind blades with ease as I attacked, his hand once again raised to defend as we exchanged tens of blows in an instant.
His hand… it was coated in touki, but it was… different.
I could see it.
Unlike a smooth gleam like usual, it was as if threads had been made across his skin, like a chainmail.
And the touki… it was extremely concentrated.
Those factors melded together, making Orsted’s hand as strong as my sword.
No, from how my arm grew numb with every impact, it was stronger!
Stepping back, I raised my blade, expecting a need to defend as I saw Eris break through my barrier, closing in on Orsted with a fierce glare.
As soon as the man turned his head away from me, I pounced, willing the touki to explode through my feet and off the ground as I shot forth, barely blocking Orsted’s defensively raised hand in time to stop him from harming Eris, but not enough to stop her from getting sent flying back from the air pressure.
“Eris! Protect them!” I yelled as I glared into Orsted’s yellow eyes.
You fucker… you dare try to touch her?
My Eris!?
Jumping back to gain some distance, I summoned a few earth lances from the ground to distract him as I set my stance, letting the colour fade from the world once again as I performed another Longsword of Light.
And, just like the time before, I was easily repelled by Orsted effortlessly reversed the technique with his superior skill, sending me flying back to the tree line.
Tasting some blood in my mouth as I grit my teeth, I crouched down yet again, watching the extremely dangerous man with a clinical eye.
Eris was… still with my sisters. Good.
And that mysterious woman… wasn’t making any movements. Also good.
And Orsted, he seemed… unperturbed… Not so good.
Right. Okay, he was stronger than me. I knew that already.
He’s at Master’s level in the Water God Style, if not higher, and likely had many other techniques he had yet to show.
Considering how he dealt with my attacks so easily and didn’t even seem concerned about my chantless magic… one thing was for sure.
Normal methods won’t work on him.
But… I was never normal, was I?
I just… needed to put everything into an attack yet again.
Just like when Ruijerd and I first fought, but this time, I couldn’t afford to be unsuccessful.
Luckily, compared to back then, I was much stronger now.
So, breathing out, I willed my mana and touki into my blade, forcing them to mix together as a blue hue formed at the edge.
And then, I pushed it outwards into the air, willing it to trace a path towards my target, Orsted’s neck.
Just like with what I learned from training in Dance of Deluge, I had my blade follow the path, but this time, I forced my body to follow the path as well.
And with the boost from wind magic at my back, combined with the explosive leap of the Longsword of Light, I had arrived at my destination before I could even comprehend what had happened, despite me enhancing my mind with touki the entire time.
Ignoring the pain that my new technique’s backlash had on my body, I watched as Orsted’s usually disinterested eyes flashed in surprise as my sword dug into his neck.
There was resistance at first, much like I used to feel when fighting a touki-clad opponent. But a moment later, I broke through, carving a gash into his skin.
Now, just a little further, and then I can put this mess behind me-!
Unfortunately, my hope was not to be, as after the first squirts of blood on Orsted began to show, I was blown back, leaving my right arm soaring in the sky, still holding my sword in hand as a trail of blood gushed from the other end.
…What?
I was reduced to a stunned silence as I felt my body impact a nearby tree, too shocked to feel any pain.
That… was my arm.
It was in the air, not attached to my body.
And Orsted… he was fine.
Cut, but still standing strong, with his left arm raised in the air.
That must have been what did me in, huh? How monstrous.
Why… I put everything into that strike, and I reached him, so why… why did I fail?
“Leon!”
Eris’ strained shout snapped me out of my daze as I felt a searing pain explode from my right side, right where my arm used to be.
Shit! What was I doing spacing out like that!?
I was still alive, the pain was proof of that! So there was still a chance!
So what if I lost an arm? Thanks to Aunt Therese, I could fix that in no time.
Circulating my mana, I let it flow into my stump to the top of my shoulder, where my arm had been separated, changing the mana into the healing element as I remembered the sensations of the Saint-tier spell.
Growth. Rejuvenation. Empowering the stem cells in my stump to grow outwards into my regular form, supplied not by proteins, but by my pure mana.
“How troublesome,” Orsted said, extending his hand.
Widening my eyes, I watched as ripples of mana shot out of his hand, quickly reaching my arm and-
“Gah!” I screamed in pain.
A shower of blood rained around me as the stump of my arm, or at least the part I was regenerating, exploded, causing a wave of pain to shoot through my body, making my vision blanch as I nearly collapsed from the burning sensation.
That… he stopped my magic?
How? Why?
No, I know why. It was to stop me from healing.
But he didn’t do that to my other magic… was he only stopping me from healing?
Shit.
As Orsted began walking towards me once more, I placed my still-intact left hand onto the ground, willing the dirt to form a blade in my hand as I compressed it further, filtering out the unneeded organic materials and minerals and supplying more material with my mana to form a hardened blade of stone and earth.
But before I could do anything with it, Orsted flashed in front of me, his hand sweeping across to shatter the makeshift blade before embedding itself in my chest.
…Huh.
I… was starting to feel a little calmer now.
That… was probably bad, right?
I shouldn’t be calm right now.
I barely registered the feeling of Orsted sliding his hand out of my torso, dropping me to the ground.
Nor did I register the strangled cries of Eris, Aisha, and Norn as all three took in my broken, beaten, and bloody form.
Shit… where was that bastard going?
Was he going to harm them? My family?
As if!
I… couldn’t just lay here and let that happen.
But, no matter how much I tried… I couldn’t move my body.
Did his strike go through my spine?
Fucking shit… that must be why I couldn’t feel my legs either.
Healing… wouldn’t work.
Orsted would just use that technique to explode it, and doing that so close to my heart could be deadly.
How did he do that? Some wave of mana to destabilize the spell?
Whatever, that didn’t matter. I needed to take him out beforehand, then I could deal with healing myself.
But, if I cast magic, he would just finish me off.
At least… if I cast magic seriously…
Orsted stopped as the dirt beneath his feet began to crawl up his legs.
“...What pathetic resistance,” he said, turning back to me. “You surprised me with that strength, but what are you doing now?”
Casting the earth magic to distract him, I continued building the mana above my palm, compressing and visualizing what I wanted to do.
Shit… the blood in my mouth tasted horrible… I had to finish this quickly before I started drowning in it.
Oh… Eris and my sisters were coming closer… I had to let this go before they got too close.
At least they were behind me.
“Hm?” Orsted hums, seemingly noticing the gathered mana in my hand. “What is this? A final attack?”
Right… what did Rudy call this again?
Ah, that’s right.
“Hehe,” I choked out with a strained smile. “It’s called nuclear fission, you fucker.”
What was the smallest thing in the world?
A grain of sand? A human cell? A protein? A molecule?
No… the smallest ‘thing’ was an atom.
And going deeper than that, there was the nucleus.
The building blocks of this world and everything that exists, has existed, and will ever exist.
And I… forced that building block to split.
A small light emerged from my hand, slowly gaining in brightness and intensity as it grew.
Willing the pure, unfathomable energy to concentrate into a projectile, I released it, right at the fucker that was staring at me with interest, as if I was a dog standing on its hind legs.
But, as the explosion surged forth, I watched as Orsted leaped out of the way, nearly unscathed save for the singed hair and coat.
…It missed.
Watching as my attack obliterated a distant mountaintop, setting the sky alight in a flash of orange, I felt my body collapse to the ground, unmoving as my heart began to slow.
That… was all of it. All of my mana.
That… was my final attack.
And now… I would die.
And I couldn’t even stop this monster… fuck.
“So that’s it, huh?” Orsted said, leering at me wearily. “...You are dangerous. Good thing that seems to be the last of your resistance.”
I took in a laboured breath before I felt my head get pulled upwards, my face turned to look up at the crying face of Eris, tears trailing down her cheeks as she desperately covered my gaping wound with her hands.
“Y-You’ll be okay! Y-You’re always okay! You have to be okay!” Eris shouted, choking on her words as they gradually turned into sobs, though her sobs slowly began to mute as I lost my sense of hearing.
That… wasn’t a good face she was wearing.
I… wanted to comfort her.
A pretty girl shouldn’t be looking like that.
She should be… happier.
With the last of my strength, I willed my left arm upwards, just enough to caress her cheek as my thumb brushed her smooth skin, tracing her jaw as I smeared it with my blood.
Ah… whoops.
That was a little gross, wasn’t it?
I hope… she isn’t mad at me…
I then moved my eyes to the side, watching as Aisha and Norn looked on with similarly tear-stained faces, their expressions a mix of shock, horror, and desperation.
Dammit… it seems like I made everyone sad, didn’t I?
I wanted to speak, but… I couldn’t.
I wanted to tell them to run.
I wanted to tell Eris to take my sisters and run away, to live.
I wanted to tell them to eat well, be safe, and find Rudy, or even head back to Paul if he hadn’t left yet. Maybe even Ruijerd if they could find him in the south.
I wanted to tell my sisters to grow up into the amazing women I knew they would be.
I wanted to tell Eris to live happily and find love, but selfishly, to still hold a special place for me in her heart.
I wanted to tell them to get on their knees and beg Orsted to spare them. Just survive and live happily, just like I always hoped for, regardless of their hatred or pride.
But… I couldn’t, for I could not speak.
I’m sorry, you three, for making you so sad.
I’m sorry for causing you so much pain.
I’m sorry for not being strong enough to protect you and myself.
I’m sorry for not keeping my promises.
I’m sorry for missing so many memories.
I’m sorry for not getting our family back together.
I’m sorry…
Shit… what a lousy brother I am… and what a lousy lover…
I promised Eris a life of loving memories and promised myself to keep my sisters happy and safe, yet here I was, bleeding out on the ground, depleted of all my mana.
Truly… a shame.
And with that, my vision went black, as everything faded away to nothingness, bitterness being the last emotion I felt.