Chapter 10
***
Su Hang had been back from HK for two or three days already, but he stayed holed up in his study the entire time, barring mealtimes. This made Shen Xi very confused. If he was going to be so busy anyway, why doesn't he go to work in the company?
So after breakfast that day, seeing Su Hang head for his study again, Shen Xi couldn't help but ask: "Is your work particularly busy right now?"
"It's not that bad." After a brief pause, Su Hang replied.
"I feel like you've been in your study all day for the past few days. Wouldn't it be better if you go to the company if things are this busy?"
"It's tolerable." Su Hang sounded like he had been wronged.
"Er…"
"There's no need to go to the company." Su Hang stubbornly said.
Shen Xi was startled as she looked at Su Hang. She wasn't sure if she had hallucinated it, but she swore that Su Hang's eyes looked just like Chu Wu for a second there.
"Alright." For some reason, an unprovoked sense of guilt rose from Shen Xi's heart. She felt like she had just bullied someone just now.
Su Hang pursed his lips as he awkwardly stood there. He had intended to go to his study, but after Shen Xi's words, he didn't want to go anymore. He looked at Shen Xi, who looked more than a little confused, and suddenly felt fed up with himself. Why is it that he couldn't speak properly when it came to Shen Xi?
Fortunately, today's Shen Xi was a Shen Xi who had been reborn. She was someone who had lived with Su Hang for five years already. This extremely awkward conversation wasn't anything new to her. In the past, Shen Xi would silently walk away whenever she encountered this kind of situation, but now, Shen Xi wanted to change get along with Su Hang. So she raised her head and asked him: "Are you free this afternoon?"
"Huh?" Su Hang looked at Shen Xi in confusion.
"Are you free this afternoon?" Shen Xi repeated with a smile.
"Yes." Su Hang nodded his head with certainty. That is, even if he wasn't, he'd make it so that he was free. This was something Su Hang conveniently left out.
"Mrs. Zhang reminded me this morning that all the gifts we received on our wedding are still piled up and unopened in the upstairs guest room." Shen Xi said. "If you have some time later, let's go have a look so Mrs. Zhang can clean up."
"Alright." Su Hang nodded.
"We can do it after lunch." Shen Xi suggested.
"Nn." When Su Hang turned around to leave, there was a faint smile on his lips.
When Mrs. Zhang came out of the kitchen with a rag in her hand, she happened to see Su Hang, who was heading to his study. She was about to say hello, but Su Hang nodded to her first. A surprised Mrs. Zhang walked to the dining table and started tidying up. While she did so, she couldn't help but chat with Shen Xi. "Sir looks very happy today."
"Oh?" Shen Xi casually commented as her gaze drifted towards the direction of the study.
"Yes, I just saw him smiling. I've been here for more than a year, but I've only ever seen him smile twice." Mrs. Zhang replied.
"When was the other time?" Shen Xi asked.
"It was on your wedding day. That morning, Sir had a smile on, the entire time." Mrs. Zhang answered.
Shen Xi looked down at the ring on her hand, her expression thoughtful.
Meanwhile, a certain someone who claimed he was busy with work was currently leaning on his chair with a silly expression, his computer not even turned on. After a while, his smile twisted, and with a wrinkled brow and annoyed expression, he dropped his head and hit his desk with a slam.
"Su Hang, what are you going to do? You need to get a hold of yourself." The angel and demon sitting on Su Hang's shoulders began to fight.
"You're married now, she's your wife. Such thoughts are normal." The devil seduced.
"But didn't you marry her to help her? You shouldn't take advantage of the situation." The angel warned.
"Then why didn't you make it clear that this is nothing but a fake marriage? That you'd just wait for the Shen Group to recover, then divorce her?" The devil replied. "You didn't explain because you selfishly desire more."
"But Shen Xi doesn't like you. Didn't you know this from the start?" The angel argued. "Are you really capable of forcing Shen Xi?"
"She agreed to marry you even when she didn't need to. She agreed to accept you. And isn't she being kind to you? Maybe she likes you too?" The devil said.
"Oh, well, if Shen Xi likes you, then there's no issue." Surprisingly, the angel and demon had come to an agreement.
Su Hang hit the desk with his head again. He knew that the longer he stayed with Shen Xi, the more his selfishness would grow. He would eventually lose control.
These past few days they spent living together, Shen Xi kept bombarding him with her kindness. She smiled at him, talked to him, and cared for him. All this made Su Hang delusional. He couldn't help thinking that maybe Shen Xi liked him.
How can he have such a ridiculous thought? He knew that Shen Xi was like this because of her upbringing. She was a kind and polite person ever since she was a child. How can he not be aware of this?
He had been brought back into the Su Family when he turned 18. In this so-called upper-class environment, none of his peers thought much of Su Hang, so he never had any friends. Because no matter how hard one worked, or how great they became, these so-called 'real' noble families would still look down on a person just because of the circumstances of their birth.
Su Hang still remembered the first time he saw Shen Xi after studying abroad. Shen Xi had been wearing a pink dress, and was sitting on a sofa as she chatted with a Miss from the Yun family. Countless young men would approach Shen Xi and invite her to dance. And every time, she would politely refuse them, one by one.
Su BoNian had noticed him staring. Even today, Su Hang still remembered what Su BoNian had said to him in perfect clarity. Su BoNian had said: "That's Shen Xi, part of the Shen family. Most of the most famous families in City S are gathered here tonight, so your future wife is likely one of these little girls."
Su Hang turned his head to look at Su BoNian.
"But don't even think about Shen Xi. Shen HeChuan would never let his baby girl marry an illegitimate son who grew up in an orphanage." Su BoNian said.
Su Hang knew he wasn't an illegitimate child. It was just because the marriage between his mother and Su BoNian hadn't been recognized by these so-called elites that he was labeled so. It was ridiculous.
But when Su Hang took control of Su Group and pressured the company shareholders to rescue the failing Shen Group, Su BoNian laughed. "You look just like me when I went against my grandfather. But this won't end well. You know this."
"Do you think that if you marry Shen Xi, you'll get what you want?" Su BoNian said. "Girls like Shen Xi are proud, down to their very bones. If you marry her this way, she won't appreciate you, much less like you. She'll just think you're some toad trying to eat swan meat. She'll think you forced her to do this, and will probably hate you."
"You should've waited for her to fall even lower, and let reality crush her pride." Su BoNian suggested. "When that happens, she'll willingly attach herself to you."
"I'm not like you." Su Hang coldly answered his father. "Your cowardice made my mother's life miserable, but I would never hurt Shen Xi."
Su BoNian no longer spoke. Instead, he smiled meaningfully, as if he knew that tragedy was inevitable.
Deep down, Su Hang knew that while his father's words were cruel, they were justified. Shen Xi would despise him. Su Hang understood this. Although Shen Xi agreed to marry him for the sake of her family, emotionally, she would be 10,000% unwilling and would be unhappy.
From the very start, Su Hang had been very reluctant to hurt Shen Xi this way. Although he would have the right to do so, he didn't want to pressure Shen Xi into anything. So even before they got married, Su Hang had already planned to refrain from being a real couple with Shen Xi, and would instead focus on helping Shen Group recover. But in the end, he never told Shen Xi of his intentions. When Shen Xi walked towards him under a white veil, when they kissed by the altar, greed and delusion grew in his heart.
What if, he thought. What if Shen Xi could gradually come to like him?
Su Hang decided to keep his plans to himself. He wouldn't force Shen Xi, nor would he tell her. He'll give her time. Maybe one day, she would accept him.
But now Su Hang was a little scared. The longer he got along with Shen Xi, the more he felt his control slipping. Every time Shen Xi smiled at him, Su Hang wanted to run over and kiss her. He was afraid that if things go on like this, he would snap, run into Shen Xi's room one night and force himself onto her. After all, they were husband and wife, weren't they?
He let Mrs. Zhang go home every night, leaving them alone. Wasn't this because he had such terrible intentions?
The more he thought about it, the more fidgety Su Hang became. He felt like someone possessed. In the end, he continued to bang his head against the desk until he calmed down.
At lunch, Shen Xi was shocked when she saw Su Hang at the table. She pointed towards his swollen forehead and anxiously asked: "Are you alright? Did you hit a wall?"
"Ah?" Su Hang covered his forehead and replied: "I just wasn't paying attention, it doesn't matter…"
"But why is it so swollen?"
"It's nothing, I…" As he said this, Shen Xi suddenly walked towards him, causing Su Hang to freeze.
"Mrs. Zhang, please help me get the medicine box." Shen Xi suddenly reached out and touched Su Hang's forehead checking it carefully.
Shen Xi took out a can of medicine spray from the box. She gingerly stroked the red skin while she sprayed some of the medicine. Still worried, Shen Xi said: "It's so swollen…let's see if the anti-inflammatory spray works. If it's still looking bad in a few hours, we can try a hot compress."
Su Hang's eyes narrowed as he felt Shen Xi's soft fingers on his skin. He could hear the concern in her voice, and her fragrance lingered at his nose.
The woman that he loved was standing so close to him. She was worried about him and talked so tenderly. As her fingers quivered against his forehead, his delusions forcefully came back to the front of his mind. Like a hungry beast, it frantically pulled at the shackles that held it down as it growled at him:
'What are you waiting for? Aren't you married already? You have the right to take what's yours. Don't shut me up and let me out.'