Run, Girl (If You Can)

Chapter 482: Don't Make Me Watch

"Hey, Noah?" Violet asked softly, finally giving up on trying to sleep.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for coming to get me. I'm not sure what I did that made you hate me…but whatever it is I'm really sorry. You don't have to wait with me. I'm sure someone else will answer their phone by the time I get out of here," she said with a tired attempt at a smile.

Hate her?! He could never! But Violet had always been sensitive to the way other people acted towards her. In her mind, his avoidance could definitely be misconstrued like that.

"I could never hate you!" Noah blurted. "I was just…I only…I…"

"You what?" Violet asked dully. "What other reason could you possibly have for not answering any of messages for weeks and then not reaching out at all when I stopped trying? No matter how busy you've been before, you've never done that."

Ah, he really couldn't explain himself without telling her the truth about his feelings that he had kept hidden for about half of their friendship. If he told her now, she might never want to speak to him again. But it wasn't like they had been talking anyway…

All of this had happened because Noah kept things to himself for too long. If he had been less of a coward he would have confessed to her years ago. But was it really okay to tell a woman you love her when she's in a relationship with someone else?

Maybe if he used different words… He didn't have to specifically say he was in love with her. He could make this about Jeremy.

"You ignored me first," Noah pointed out. "I didn't want to get in the way of your relationship so I took a step back but Vi…that guy is no good. He didn't even come to take care of you when you got hurt."

Confusion and hurt lit Violet's eyes. "You've never had a problem with my boyfriends before. Was that really it? You avoided me for the first time in our lives because you don't like Jeremy?"

It would be so easy to say yes and let this whole thing blow over. What should he do? If Noah added on something like 'he was taking you away from me' he would sound like a child. That was the last thing he wanted.

Nothing lasted forever. This was always going to have to happen one way or another. The time had finally come to tell the truth.

If he didn't, he would have to carry on pitifully as a little brother figure for the rest of his life. Even if he got rejected now it needed to be said. Tiptoeing around like this wasn't fair to either of them.

Violet didn't like change; she never had. Neither did Noah. They were comfortable with each other and so they stuck together for the last twenty-four years. But they weren't siblings and they couldn't keep acting like they were when his feelings for her were anything but brotherly.

If he didn't say this now, he would never even be able to try moving on for real. There would never be anyone else like Violet but he couldn't hold her back anymore.

"You think I want to hang around watching you be with someone else again? I'm sick of it, Violet. I really can't take it anymore. I know I never said anything…but it really isn't fair to make me wait around for you forever," Noah began.

Once the words started coming, they wouldn't stop. All of this had been building up inside of him for over a decade.

"Everybody else around us can see it but you. Your brothers haven't been teasing you about me for no reason! They know I've been in love with you for most of my life! So please…I know you don't feel that way about me but at least don't make me watch as you're with a guy who is all wrong for you and expect everything to be okay."

Violet gaped at him, completely dumbstruck. She opened her mouth several times, looking like she wanted to say something, but wasn't able to get the words out.

A nurse called her name and came out with a wheelchair to whisk her away into an examination room and she still continued craning her neck to stare at Noah wordlessly as she was taken away.

Great. He had completely blown everything but at least it was out now.

Now what? Noah really didn't want to leave her alone not knowing if someone else was actually going to come pick her up once they were done looking at her. So he found himself remaining seated in the hard plastic waiting room chair even though he dreaded hearing what she might have to say when she came back out.

Noah had already tried calling Kaleb and Nathan but neither of them were picking up their phones. He didn't have that jerk Jeremy's number. Calling her parents wouldn't do any good since he knew from social media that they were currently on a cruise in Europe.

And so he continued to wait. And wait. And wait some more. What on earth was taking them so long?

Noah hadn't even picked Violet up from her show until nearly 10 PM so it was after midnight now. Normally he would have been asleep by now but right now he was too keyed up after finally telling her how he felt. He wasn't tired at all.

Dread filled him at the thought that Violet would cut ties with him completely because of what he said tonight but wasn't that better than wasting away at her side as she was with someone else? It was a lose-lose situation no matter what.

If she broke up with Jeremy, Noah would probably fall back into their old pattern of friendship in a heartbeat if that was what she wanted because it was what he was used to. But at this point he doubted she would want that.

Who would willingly keep someone next to them that harbored unrequited feelings for them? He had lost her either way and now he would have to get used to life without her on a permanent basis.