Stranger's Handbook

Chapter 101: The Style of the Duke’s Household

“Where’s that stupid Albert!?”

“In the reception room-nya, your excellency!”

“Ufufu, take care, my dear.”

After I promised Katalina that I would buy her an expensive blouse, and brushed Bea’s hair with all I got, I rushed out into the corridor.

Toto was sitting on my shoulder......She plays the role of the overseer.

But it’s not like I would tease that junky sister or something, would I.....?

“Albert, you idiot, what did you...........”

When I stepped inside the reception room, a fairly chaotic scene unfolded to me.

“Sister, I will take responsibility. Let me marry you and take care of you!”

“God........To take a break from God.........but I was still too inexperienced. But now that it came to this, I will start the fire again with water! And then, the rain will transform into a muddy stream and return to the sea. I must receive God’s divine protection no matter what! We mustn’t wait!”

...............I didn’t understand a thing.

I tried to sort the situation out.

The sister was sitting on the sofa with her clothes ravaged; she was hiding her exposed chest. Albert was kneeling down in front of her, proposing.

...............In spite of everything, I still don’t get it.

“Albert........please explain........”

A maid brought some clothes and I asked the sister to go change.

As one would expect, I couldn’t leave a half-naked woman in that state. Besides, if Bea were to see this, other unnecessary problems would occur.

“Yes, your excellency.......The sister came to meet you. She brought a letter for your excellency.”

“Okay, it’s all clear until now.”

“However, because the sister was very concerned about her chest, I demanded an explanation. I asked her about what she was hiding in there.”

“.........Then?”

“The sister did nothing but mutter things I couldn’t understand........Like, a sister who talks in the name of God would never deceive the man!........”

“What did you do then?”

“I suddenly took off her clothes to check whether she........was hiding something.......”

“....................I see......................”

This sure is a problematic situation...............

Most likely.......that junky sister was keeping something at her chest, and Albert wanted to know what.

She explained it in her own language but Albert misunderstood her.

The sister’s ‘God talk’ was probably a bad choice.

Albert revealed this God obsessed sister’s pure and innocent body to the world.........or something like that.

“And after you stripped her, you felt responsible.......right? It can’t be helped that you suspected her. But she’s that sister, you know......I’m sure there were other means to do this.”

“I don’t know how to answer this.”

“You know, this strictness of your is a virtue, but you should learn to choose your methods according to your opponent. You’re a noble, you have to learn how to use people, all right?”

“.......Yes.”

“Why didn’t you use the maids unit?”

“.......Please forgive me for acting rashly.”

Albert rubbed his head against the floor.

......Dear me! He’s such a helpless guy.

“Leave the rest to me. You go report the details to Bea, and tell her to come here.”

“But”

“It’s okay, so go. I’ll do something about this. If you feel responsible, just return the favor on the battlefield.”

“..............As you wish!”

I saw Albert off and drank some black tea.

...............What should I do?..............I can’t find a solution.............

I tried to hide my stomach pain through drinking tea, as I waited for the sister’s return.

“Zest-sama, I heard about everything that happened. What will you do?”

“I can’t really blame Albert for this......I must cleverly think of a compromise plan.......”

Bea came to me, making a worried expression.

It’s true that when Albert became suspicious of her, he wasn’t mistaken in his conduct.

He wasn’t mistaken, but he wasn’t precisely right either. This was the problem.

Still, Albert is my cute, trusted servant 1.......I want to save him.

But this sister is the next Pope, so it’ll be problematic if we don’t agree upon something.......

I kept on worrying about this, when the sister entered the room, her clothes changed.

It seems that she is wearing Bea’s clothes.......Her chest is hollow, but I’m not allowed to look at that.

“Your excellency, thank you for your concern.”

“Don’t say that. It is I who should apologize to you. Sister.........Am I too arrogant if I want to live by God’s benevolence?”

The sister sat on the sofa and, after she corrected her posture, she informed me.

“To live by God’s benevolence is not evil. As a tree needs the earth, the water chases after the sea. To say nothing of an act of worrying about your neighbor and wishing for blessings upon another person, this is too in accordance with God’s will.”

(Dad, is this junky verbally impaired?)

The junky sister smiled sweetly.

...............I see. I don’t really get it, but it seems to be working.

“This incident with Albert, was precisely conducted by his concern for me. In short, it was as you said, sister, ‘An act of wishing for blessings upon another person’. Will God forgive this?”

“Fufufu, God will forgive it. I am inexperienced and imperfect. And since I am imperfect, asking the other person to be perfect would be a wrong reasoning from my part.”

(!?Dad, I finally understood what the junky is trying to say!)

..............It was the first time I admired her as a sister.

You’re a wonderful person, aren’t you, sister! Your speech is a piece of junk though.

Besides, Toto, will you be a little quiet? Dad is trying his best not to laugh here.

“To your mercy, sister.......and to God’s teachings, I offer my sincere gratitude and respect.”

“Sister, you have my gratitude and respect too........”

We lowered our heads and the sister responded with a kind smile.

“No, I too didn’t have enough self-control and ended up talking in the name of God......Please forgive my inexperience.”

The sister made a praying pose, bringing her hands together in front of her inexperienced chest.

I looked in that direction by mistake but Bea still pinched me.

................Women understand men’s looks.

(Dad, do you like her chest? Do you like them hollow?)

Stop it! Bea is looking at me with a terrible expression, so please stop it!

After all, I solved the problem quite cheaply; it only costed me a custom-made bra and some priestess clothes as presents for the sister.

If she were to marry Albert, I would’ve been suspected of rebelling and a war might’ve started........

I saw the sister off; she looked extremely pleased with herself.

She ended up with a custom-made spirit bra, not a mass-produced item........I kind of feel bad for the dwarves, but it can’t be helped.

I returned to my room, thinking about getting some rest, only to see Albert on the floor, waiting in a kneeling position.

“You idiot! How long are you planning to stay like that? Don’t worry about the past. And don’t do it again. That’s all there is to it.”

“He’s right. What’s done is done. Next time do it better.”

“I will never forget your kind words!”

Yes, this is good......I’m quite the kind master.

Albert was shedding tears as he lowered his head, at which point Bea said to him, wearing a kind smile.

“Albert, you have two more times left!”

(Two more times! I’m looking forward to it!)

................Two more times?

Albert and I looked blankly at the two girls; we certainly heard them say that.

“Our house only allows for three mistakes. That’s why, you have only two left, right?”

“ “What happens if there’s a........fourth time?” “

Albert and I harmonized at which Bea informed us, as she put on a Frontier Count-like smile.

“The fourth time, you will take a walk in a faaar away and hiiiiiigh above place. That’s how things were in the Frontier Count’s Household.......Do you disagree, Zest-sama?”

(Woaaa, this looks like fun, Mom!)

This is no good.......Albert begged me with his eyes to refuse Bea’s proposal.

“This is a truly wonderful idea! Let our Duke’s Household do the same.”

“......As you.............wish, your excellencies.........”

It’s not bad that he managed to say this, while his feet trembled violently........I can’t oppose her and you know it.

Sorry Albert.........and good luck.............

Compared to a few moments ago, Albert’s never ending cry had a different meaning now.

1. This is a wordplay on the word ‘fukushin’; normally, it is written with the kanji for ‘stomach’ and ‘heart’ (腹心) and it means ‘trusted friend/retainer’, but here the author changed the second kanji with another ‘shin’ (臣) which means ‘slave/servant’