The Protagonist System

67 Prisons Can Be Mental

I woke up from a great nap and I was snugly warm and comfortable. I nuzzled the neck my lips were against and heard a soft hum and a breathy moan. That sound gave me a bit of confidence and I moved my hand to pet her cheek as I continued to kiss the skin, only to realize the cheek I was cupping was a lot bigger than it should have been... and I was still a baby.

Damn my adult reactions. I thought and sighed as I stopped. “Sowwy, Andi.” I mumbled and moved my hand from tenderly holding her face and lifted my head from her shoulder, only to see a blushing handsome woman as she stared at me. I needed to make up for what I did and explain it a little. “Comfy warm.” I whispered and cupped her face again.

Andromeda kept staring at me. “Harry, I... why am I getting the feeling that you want to kiss me?”

“You smart.” I said and gave her a quick peck on the lips.

Andromeda blinked her eyes at me for several seconds. “No, not like that.”

I smiled at her. “When older, give good kiss.” I said and patted her cheek. “Go to prison now?”

Andromeda looked like she wanted to say something, changed her mind, and gave me a pointed look. “I'll still be married then, Harry.”

“Still kiss.” I said and pointed to the backyard through the house, because that's where the teleportation circle was. “Ready go?”

“Yes, I'm ready to go.” Andromeda said and carefully held me and stood up from the couch. “We will discuss the other thing later.”

I beamed a smile at her and couldn't resist teasing her. “Like it? Do again?”

Andromeda almost skipped a step when I said that, which made me giggle. “Cheeky brat.”

We entered the kitchen and Nymphadora was there eating lunch. She looked up at us and her face went bright red, from both a blush of embarrassment and the literal color red, and she stood up.

“Harry, I'm really sorry!” Nymphadora exclaimed. “I didn't mean for...”

“It okay.” I said and waved at her. “Know what to do.”

“What?” Nymphadora asked, a little nervous as her face went back to a normal skin color.

“Andi? Down.” I said and the woman gave me a pointed look. “Make right.”

Andromeda sighed and put me down. “I don't know why I'm trusting you like this.”

“I, Harry Potter, best Harry Potter.” I said and patted her thigh and walked over to Nymphadora. “Me sowwy. Too tired 'n fell. Not you fault.”

Nymphadora looked from my face to her mother's.

“Hugs.” I said and put my arms around her waist to hug her. I was 17 months old and she was 7 years old, so the height difference was considerable.

Nymphadora tried to put her arms around my shoulders, realized she couldn't, and stepped back to kneel and gave me a real hug.

“Kisses.” I said and I heard Andromeda suck in a sharp breath.

Nymphadora stiffened in my arms and then leaned back. “Wh-what?”

“Kiss sowwy. Feel better.” I said.

Nymphadora looked up at Andromeda and Nymphadora frowned slightly, so I guessed that Andi had shaken her head no. I knew that was exactly the wrong thing to do, because daughters rebelled against their mothers and any decisions they thought were unfair, like kissing a national hero. I saw Nymphadora's frown disappear and she had a determined look on her face.

I smiled at her and she puckered her lips a little for me, so I gave her a much better kiss than just a peck. It wasn't open mouth or anything; but, I wasn't keeping my lips still, either. I cast the specific healing spell on her as well, which made her glow slightly and Andi gasped.

The funny thing was, I actually ended up kissing Nymphadora about six times before Andromeda's cough brought the both of us out of the little world we had been caught in. Nymphadora's face was bright red again and she looked both happy and embarrassed. She had enjoyed the kissing, too.

I giggled and gave her a quick peck, which made her giggle, too. She let me out of the hug and I reached into a pocket and created a shrunken plushie doll of myself. I pulled it out and let it go. It popped to full size, which was life-size and matched me, and Nymphadora squealed and snatched it up to squeeze the life out of it.

“See? Make happy.” I said and walked back over to Andromeda. “Bring food?”

Andromeda gave me a pointed look and then she sighed and went to the refrigerator. She took out several containers and I took out a stone black backpack from inventory. She gave me another pointed look and loaded everything into the backpack, slung it over her shoulder, and picked me up to hold me again.

“More coming?” I asked as she carried me into the backyard.

“No, Nymphadora didn't like going last time and Ted is home from work today. He's staying here to watch her.” Andromeda said and took a deep breath as if to prepare for apparition.

“Keep secret?” I asked and she stopped and looked at my face. “Look there.”

Andromeda looked over to where I pointed as I keyed her into the notice-me-not charm and let her see through the thin layer of dirt. She gasped and quickly strode over to the area and stared down at the ten foot wide circle. I hadn't made it as big as the one used in the dungeon, because I wouldn't be transporting large groups of people and equipment with it.

“What is that?” Andromeda asked.

“Port to prison.” I said and her mouth opened and closed several times, just like when she was inexplicably allowed into the prison and was trying to explain it to herself. “Hop on. We go.”

Andromeda gave me a pointed look, as if she was trying to figure me out. “You are a lot more mature than you let on, aren't you?”

“See? You smart.” I said and waved at the teleportation circle.

Andromeda took a deep breath and tentatively stepped on, like it was made of ice and was going to break.

I chuckled, because she probably thought it would be like a portkey or something. “Here fine.”

“What do you mean? Shouldn't we go to the middle and...” Andromeda gasped when the thing lit up and we disappeared in a flash of light and appeared near the prison. The astonished look on her face was hilarious and I giggled and laughed my baby laugh. It took her a minute before she recovered and she glared at me.

I gave her a kiss on the cheek to distract her from being angry at me for laughing. “Sowwy. Andi funny.”

“Cheeky brat.” Andromeda grumbled and carried me over to the short road and walked up it to the prison.

A guard was there at the door and nodded to her as we approached and held a hand out. I took out the letter and handed it to him. He read it through, just like the warden had, and handed it back. He opened the door and led us inside. We didn't get the lecture this time and went right up to the top floor.

Not surprisingly, the guard stayed right there with us as we tried to talk to Sirius. The idiot still refused to admit anything and was punishing himself, so we asked the guard if he could hand over the tupperware containers of food we brought and he could have some, too.

He looked surprised by the offer, gave us a real smile, and diligently checked the food to make sure there were no weapons or wands inside and ate a few generous samples to make sure it wasn't poisoned. That reason made me giggle and Andromeda had to cover her mouth to stifle her own laugh. The guard winked at her and handed everything through the food slot in the door.

Sirius tried to ignore it, he really did. The smell of the open containers was just too much for him after two months of prison rations and he was on the containers like a rabid dog. This had me giggling as well and Andromeda barked a laugh. We stayed for another ten minutes, just to make sure Sirius ate as much as possible without choking to death, and left with smiles on our faces.

“Thank you very much for allowing that, sir.” Andromeda said when we reached the front door.

“The food was delicious and turkey with the trimmings was an appropriate bribe for working the holiday.” The man said and bowed to her as we went through the door. “See you next month.”

Andromeda nodded and carried me down the road away from the prison.

“Pafoo still sad.” I said and she sighed.

“Yes, he's got it in his fool head that whatever happened is his fault, whether he actually did something or not.” Andromeda said.

I thought about how much to tell her, then mentally shrugged. “Secret keeper changed. Him to Peetee. Peetee told Dark Wanker.”

Andromeda sucked in a sharp breath at what I said and then she huffed. “Dark Wanker?”

“Other names too long.” I said with a shrug and she laughed.

“That I agree with, Harry.” Andromeda said and I pointed to where the teleportation circle was. She carried me over to it and stopped walking when my finger pointed down. “Why can't I see this one?”

“Hid to hide them. Only told you.” I said and she looked surprised. I charged up the circle and we disappeared in a flash of light and reappeared in her backyard.

Andromeda looked down and only saw the dirt. “I see... or don't see.”

I giggled. “Keep notice-not up. No one else see.”

“I won't try to dispel it, just so my daughter isn't out here digging it up.” Andromeda agreed.

“Tank you.” I said and hugged her neck to kiss her cheek again. “Keep visiting.”

“Why? Why are you doing this?” Andromeda gave me a pointed look. “You could have gone to anyone to bring along to visit Sirius and you chose me. Why?”

I wasn't going to tell her it was chance, because in this world, there was rarely anything left to chance. I was sure I was meant to meet her, thanks to Fate rewarding me for doing so well on the last world. She had hundreds of thousands of new fates to play with there and had Karma points galore to manipulate things and have fun with.

I put my little hands on her cheeks and looked deep into her eyes. “Because.” I whispered and leaned forward to lightly peck her lips. “Sometimes.” I gave her another tender peck. “Strong women.” I let her see how sincere I was and gave her one last peck. “Need help.”

Andromeda's eyes were wide as her face flushed to a deep red with a blush. “Sweet Merlin...”

“Me Harry. Not Merlin.” I said and smiled at her.

Andromeda huffed and shook her head. “There must be something wrong with me. I'm actually enjoying your attention when I would slap anyone else for daring to make a pass at me.”

“I, Harry Potter, best Harry Potter!” I said and did my hero pose to make her laugh.

Andromeda did and shook her head again. “I'm glad my husband isn't watching us right now.”

“Strong notice-not on corner of yard.” I said. “Harry down.”

Andromeda looked conflicted for a moment, then she knelt to carefully set me on my feet. “Call me next month and we can arrange when to go to Azkaban to visit Sirius again.”

“Number?” I asked and produced a piece of paper and a pen for her.

Andromeda wrote the number down and handed it to me. She looked conflicted again, then sighed and moved forward to place a kiss on my forehead. “I am a horrible wife to want affection from a toddler.”

I reached up with both hands to cup her face. “Andi, no fault. Too pwetty to ignore.”

Andromeda chuckled. “Even your compliments are better than any I've heard before.”

“I, Harry Potter...” I prompted with a grin.

“...best Harry Potter.” Andromeda said with a smile. “All right, I get it. It's because it's you.”

“You really smart!” I praised her and she laughed. “Step away or you come, too.”

Andromeda pet my head with a fond look on her face, stood, and stepped back until I nodded. “Bye, Harry.”

“Bye, Andi!” I waved exaggeratedly and almost fell over. It made her laugh, which was why I did it. I activated the teleportation circle and disappeared from there and appeared at home.

“Youse just in time.” Nanny said and brought me to my room and we quickly changed my clothes for supper.

The castle was becoming the best home in the world and I would do my best to keep it that way. The next step was to teach Petunia about magic, where to start, and how to study for it. She had a lot of catching up to do and I had a lot of work to do.

*

Several years ago, a 26 year old Gilderoy Lockhart was stuck in a dead-end job as an Obliviator for the ministry. It was a boring job having to go in after incidents to clean up the muggle minds that saw a bit too much of a wizard's adventurers. He wouldn't complain about being safe about it, either. He was a cautious one and made sure he wasn't in any danger when he handled things.

After a couple of years, his work eventually gave him a bit of autonomy and he was being sent out on his own more that once, which made him even more cautious. Despite not being a very powerful wizard, he was smart about his own personal safety and how he dealt with things.

Some of the stories he heard from a few wizards were loads of tripe and everyone knew it. The thing was, none of the wizard's friends questioned him about it. That started the man thinking.

What if he did the same thing while off on his own? It wasn't like there would be anyone else around to refute his version of events. Plus, he was an accomplished Obliviator and could handle anyone that might have been.

It started Gilderoy on a slippery slope of stealing tall tales, obliviations of everyone else that had been involved with those tales, and writing them up for himself.

After six months, he had the world shattering idea to build up his writing chops by writing about the most famous wizard in Britain, Harry Potter.

It took another year of discarded ideas and failed writing attempts before the New Year arrived and he had an idea so outrageous that no one would believe it. A nundu. He would pit the 5 year old savior against one of the fiercest creatures of the magical world. He wrote out a very rough draft for the plot and story as a whole.

It would also set a precedent. If people believed that a kid could face a monster like that and defeat it, then they could easily accept an adult facing much more mundane ones, like the stories he had already stolen about yetis, banshees, and werewolves.

Gilderoy never saw the house elf that had watched him sign the pseudonym that Harry Potter had been searching for. It had been a long shot to think the fraud had been the source of the illegal books and Moppy stayed invisible until the man went to bed. She gathered everything up and popped back home to give her master a late Christmas present. She had finally found who he was looking for.

Harry Potter's toddler laugh would echo through most of his castle home on New Year's Eve and his plans for co-opting the author's name for himself were quickly implemented. Thanks to Moppy's diligence, he also had a ton more material that he could make into picture books for babies to enjoy. He just had to stop off at a certain wizard's home to give him a taste of his own medicine.